Anna, an immigrant from Central or Eastern Europe, lived in the UK for many years. For over a decade, she experienced emotional, financial, and physical abuse from her husband. At first, their relationship seemed promising. But even before they got married, there were warning signs – signs she ignored because of low self-esteem and lack of experience.
After moving to the UK, Anna started studying English and worked as an au pair. Two years later, she met the man who would become her husband. He had a job, but spent most of his free time partying and drinking heavily. In the second year of their relationship, he hit her for the first time – with a bottle, in a nightclub, pushing her head against a wall. Anna blamed it on the alcohol and decided to stay. They soon got married and later had two children.
Over the years, the abuse became financial too. Her husband controlled all the money. Anna mostly lived on child benefits. She had to ask him for basic hygiene products, and grocery shopping often ended in arguments or humiliation. While he claimed he earned very little, she later discovered he was making several times more than he said – but gave her almost nothing.
After 17 years of marriage, Anna decided to get a divorce. They still lived together, but the atmosphere was tense. When Anna broke her leg in an accident, her husband refused to help. She had to take care of their children on crutches – cooking, cleaning, bathing them – while he drank and watched TV.
When she told him she was filing for divorce, he tried to trap her in the house and take away her phone and laptop. At night, he would come into her room and accuse her of being mentally unstable. One day, she found a hidden camera in her bedroom – he had been secretly recording her. She went to the police, but at first didn’t receive support. Later, she found out he had been using an adult dating website for three years. When she brought proof to the police, they confirmed his actions were illegal. He was arrested, and the court issued a restraining order.
What followed was a difficult court battle over custody of the children. Her husband tried to ruin her reputation, questioning her mental health and accusing her of cheating. Because Anna owned a house, she didn’t qualify for legal aid – and had to pay nearly £20,000 in legal fees.
Looking for help, Anna found a local women’s support centre. There, she received psychological counselling and legal guidance. She also found something priceless: a safe space, and other women who had been through similar experiences. At times, when she couldn’t leave the house, she was given food parcels – her monthly budget was just £150.
With the help of the support workers, she applied for Universal Credit. She also enrolled in a course to become a teaching assistant. At first, she struggled with depression and low energy, but over time she began volunteering – which eventually led to paid work. Today, she works as a programme manager at a college, responsible for curriculum and student safety.
But that’s not how we met Anna.
We met her as a finalist in a beauty pageant. After everything she had gone through, Anna made the bold decision to stand on a stage – not to compete with others, but to reclaim her womanhood. For her, it was a powerful and symbolic step toward healing and dignity.
As partners of that competition, we didn’t just want to support Anna – we knew we had to support many more women who had faced violence, isolation, and silence.
Anna didn’t agree to share her photo publicly, but she touched our hearts with the very first thing she said when we met – shyly reaching out her hand to greet us with a quiet:
“Hello, I’m Anna. And through my story, I want to help women who are going through the same.”